President Xi Jinping was sitting in his Jing jing office (Be Jing) (Be is two) wondering whom to invade next when his telephone rang.
'Hello, Mr.. Jinping' a bit tipsy voice said, 'This is Bomansha from Mumbai .. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring the war on you!'
'Well, Bomansha' Xi Jinping replied, 'This is indeed important news! How big is your army'
'Right now,' said Aapro Boman, after a moment's calculation, 'there is myself, my cousin Rayo, my next door neighbour Temton, and the entire Volleyball team of our colony.
Xi Jingping paused. 'I must tell you, Bomansha that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command.'
Aeni maaini..' said Aapro Boman. 'I'll have to ring you back!'
Sure enough, the next day, Bomansha called again.
'Mr. Xi Jinping, it is Bomansha, I'm calling from my neighbour Hosi's room, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!'
'And what equipment would that be, Bomansha' Xi Jinping asked.
'Well, we have two combines, couple of strong horses from Agripada na tabela and Hosi's ambassador car.'
Xi Jinping sighed. 'I must tell you, Bomansha, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to 1-1/2 million since we last spoke.'
Oh tori maa ne lai jaa, thob ni yaar.....' said Bomansha. 'I'll have to get back to you.'
Sure enough, Bomansha rang again the next day.
'Mr. Xi Jinping, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne...... We've modified Hosi's plane that he made few year ago in his Dahunu's farm house by adding a couple of shotguns, sticking on some wings and the one brand new generator. Plus volley ball team from Next colony have joined us as well!'
Xi Jinping, takes a deep breath and says Have you heard about my armoured division and my Naval armada?
Appro Boman in haughty voice tells him, Mr Xi Jinping
We have armoured division too.
We a have collected few ambassador cars and done some modifications and our Naval armada is more powerful consisting of fishing boats and guns from Savaksha's antic gun collections.
Xi Jinping was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. 'I must tell you, Bomansha, that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!'
'Abe saala toru bhalu thai....' said Bomansha, 'I'll have to ring you back.'
Sure enough, Bomansha called again 'Sahebji Mr Xi Jinping
I am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war.'
'I'm sorry to hear that,' said Xi Jinping. 'Why the sudden change of heart'
'Well,' said Bomansha, 'we've all had a long chat over a couple of LARGE ONES, and decided there's no way we can feed two million prisoners of war!' We know you Chinese eat anything available anywhere but even all collective garbage of all Mumbai Parsi colonies is not sufficient to feed your Prisoners of war.
NOW THAT'S CALLED BAWA CONFIDENCE (AFTER COUPLE OF LARGE ONES OF COURSE)
NAVROZ SPECIAL YAAR...